We often sabotage our intentions because we have “survival habits” from the past that thwart our intentions. Why do these habits of the past block us from having the relationships we want?
Because we are not aware of what we are really thinking, feeling, speaking, and acting or we are but don’t think anyone else knows!
If you think someone is stupid, they are likely to sense that in your non-verbal behavior – eye rolls, looking away, frowning, or tone of your voice.
Our non-verbal behavior says more than the words we say. And our words can hurt the other person as well. Saying to them “That was stupid” as an accusation is not going to build trust with them.
Most of us, if we are honest, are easily hurt. So is everyone else!
The relationship you create is built on all the small moments in your interactions. They might not say anything but if you are drifting apart, it’s possible that you are doing things that are pushing them away and you don’t realize what you are doing or how it’s impacting others.
What Kind of Relationship Are You Actually Creating?
If the relationship you have isn’t caring, connected, kind, and built on mutual trust, you may be pushing them away, not creating a deeper connection.
Get curious about what is happening with them. Blaming them for “over-reacting” when you roll your eyes doesn’t help bring them closers. Neither is blaming yourself!
See what you are doing and how they are reacting to you.
Hundreds of clients have made changes in their behavior (sometimes just shifting their tone of voice or looking at the other person and smiling when they are speaking) and the relationship begins to shift.
Don’t wait for them to change. If you care and don’t know what to do, consider booking a complimentary 20 minute call with Marilyn.
You’ll fill out a form that will help you see what is happening. If you want a better relationship, you have to do something different. We can discover this together.