Work with Marilyn
We all have created habits as children to cope with the hurt we suffered. I call these “Survival Habits” because they helped us survive difficult times, like when our parents fought, we were bullied at school, or “friends” were mean to us.
We typically carry these habits that are based in fear into adulthood – and they affect how we think, feel, act, and speak now.
- Do you have to be a “Pleaser” and end up saying “yes” to others when you want to say “no” because you don’t want to disappoint them or fear rejection…and then end up feeling resentful because you give to others, they don’t help you, and you don’t know what you really want… and either does anyone else!
- Do you avoid conflict so you don’t speak up and don’t hold the boundaries you set? As a parent or leader, do you set guidelines then when kids or staff buck the rules, you give in?
- Do you have high standards for yourself, try to be perfect and be in control and life is about being and doing the best? And when you miss the mark, you shame yourself?
- Are you afraid to get in trouble so avoid being responsible by blaming others, events outside your control, or play the victim – it’s not your fault!
- Withdrawing or being invisible to “protect” you from being blamed, but feeling like no one sees, knows, or cares about you feeling you don’t deserve anything
We are all wounded, a little or a lot. It’s inescapable.
When we begin to realize these habits no longer serve us, we are often left feeling dissatisfied and confused trying to navigate this new unknown territory.
As a Love and Leadership Relationship Coach, I know how lonely that road can feel, and how easy it can be to feel stuck without knowing which way to turn to or to ask for help. My commitment is to help professional women gain the confidence to find the true version of themselves that they’ve hidden to prove they are good enough.
- Being aware when you are operating from fear and survival habits and choose to live from love and kindness for yourself and others
- Strengthen communication skills to be able to fully express yourself, your wants and needs, and your dreams with people you care about – including setting/holding boundaries
- Clarify your core values to guide you in your life and learn how to use them to make decisions with confidence
- Learn to love yourself fully once again, embracing your True Self hidden within.
If you are yearning for deeper connections with the people in your life – and not sure what to do, start with the Relationship IQ Quiz!
“When I took the quiz, I was surprised how many areas I was low. I don’t think about these being relationship skills, but they are. When I did the debrief and looked at my biggest challenges, it all made sense. I wasn’t stupid; I lacked skills and I could learn them.
What a sense of relief and excitement that I can change my family relationships, so we have more love and support with each other.”
Cynthia M, 57
“When I reviewed my quiz results with Marilyn, I saw how my weaker skills were stopping me from asking my husband for help with the kids in a loving way I thought it was him, but I realized my resentment had me be sarcastic and critical. He couldn’t win either. I learned what and how to change what I said, and now we’re working together as partners and are getting closer. So grateful…”
LB, 47, Engineer – married 12 years
It's All About You!
In one-on-one coaching, the focus is only you and you can deep dive and often move faster, getting the key learnings you need.
You get personalized coaching from me. There’s no script – it’s tailored for you and the specific situation and challenges you have.
We have a shared Coaching Collaboration Document so in between sessions you report on progress and then I review and provide feedback. It’s like getting a booster coaching session in between our sessions!
Some of the biggest struggles in building healthy relationships is how to create and maintain healthy boudaries. Check out our Introduction to Boundaries Workshop to start your journey to becoming a Boundary Master!
Are you yearning to show up powerfully? To be seen, heard, and garner more respect? To create deeper connections in your relationships?
Do you try to control the situation and then the people involved resent you for dominating them?
Are you a stickler about how things should be done and stress out yourself and others trying to make things perfect?
Have you tried all the books, and done several programs but nothing has worked?
Then From Saboteur to Sage is right for you!
Still unsure what program is right for you? Schedule a free 20-minute call with Marilyn